When Vincent was buried, our wonderful family friend, pastor Uncle Jay Jarman was present to help guide us through the process. Before Vincent's casket was lowered into the ground, Uncle Jay asked us to close our eyes and envision ourselves at the end of our lives seeing Jesus, seeing his love for us, seeing our life from his perspective. When I closed my eyes, I saw myself talking to Jesus. He was saying - "Much has been taken from you, but much has also been given to you."
Much has been taken from me. I often feel like my life so far has been an exercise in various forms of loss, which i recognize is not unique to me. Many societies less affluent than ours are much more well versed in experencing loss. Wherever there is anything precious, there exists the possibility of loss and tragedy. This is the paradox of human history. We are more fragile (and also more beloved) than we realize.
Although I have lost a great deal in my life, I have also been given much. I have been blessed with a strong will, a great husband, sweet kids, and fantastic family support. I have rich friendships with people who are virtually my family.
We are spending this week in Chicago visiting our dear friends who brought us here for some connection and rejuvenation. It's working. I feel great, and it's only been 2 days!
Much has been given, and I'm so glad for the chance to be reminded of it.