Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Not my Home

I don't like living here.  This world stinks.

I don't like that I live in a world where this stuff happens:

child prostitution
human trafficking
kid soldiers
female genital mutilation
war
more war
natural disasters
global warming
poverty
pollution
starvation
spousal abuse
family discord
death  ...and the list goes on.

I can't watch the news anymore.  When I do, the crushing feelings I have inside build until I feel like I'm about to wail, throw things, or throw up.

I can't listen to many of my friends who try to convince me that things will get better, that my personal grief over Vincent's death is something to "overcome" or "triumph" over. (oh, you should hear me rant on that one, I have many theological points in my favor!!)  So sometimes I feel like I don't have many friends, except for some of you guys online.

I'd just like to sleep all day, but I have too much stuff to do.  So instead I'm eating tons of garlic bread.  Go figure.

This world is not my home.

Can I go home now, please?

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well, I have to first say that I truly feel sorry for Dan...garlic breath stinks...and while I love to eat garlic...I don't like smelling it on hubby's breath. =) But the thought of garlic bread is making me hungry right now for some Italian food!

But in all seriousness...I don't like to watch the news either...sometimes evil, wickedness, pain and suffering overwhelm me...

And I'm sure you have a great many friends...who love you for you...your opinions and all! If they don't...well, in my experience, they're not truly friends worth having. The best of friends are with you through it all.

(((HUGS)))

Rebecca said...

Dan is actually pretty OK with garlic breath, thankfully. He hates orange breath and peanut butter breath, which is alright with me because I don't eat them all that often, and definitely not together! :)

And I totally agree with you about true friends... they stick with you through all the junk! Thanks for the hugs!

Anonymous said...

I'm with him on the peanut butter breath...ugh. =)

I was praying for you this morning...I'm sure you're getting up about now. I'm praying for the warmth of the Sonshine to envelop you today...whatever you are doing. May you feel His presence. Blessings.

jess.modaff said...

Would it be insensitive to ask you to consider posting sometime on that part about "triumphing over" or "overcoming" Vincent's death and the theological points in your favor? I'm really interested in your perspective (and I totally think you're right, but just want to hear your thoughts).

Rebecca said...

Hi Jess!

I sure I will post something about it in the future, just not now. I'll wait until my tone improves a bit... :)